Family

Posted by Riya in Family 11M ago
A child asks, "Mommy, does God use our bathroom?" The mother replies, "No darling. Why do you ask?" The child says, "Because every morning daddy bangs on the door and shouts, 'Oh God, are you still in there?'"
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Posted by Riya in Family 11M ago
Growing up, my parents never grounded me unless they were really really mad. I can remember the first time they caught me drinking under age. Mom freaked out and grounded me for a month, but I guess that was a reasonable response for a parent of a second grader.
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Posted by Riya in Family 11M ago
I went to my sisters house and saw her packing a suitcase. I asked, "What's going on?" She said, "I'm feeling homesick." I suggested, "But you're at your home now." She replied, "I know. I'm sick of it!"
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Posted by Riya in Family 11M ago
I'm tired of my grandma! Whenever someone's wedding comes up, she says, "Next is your turn." So I've decided when someone dies I'm going to say, "Next is your turn, grandma."
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Posted by Riya in Family 11M ago
The bride, upon her engagement, goes to her mother and says, "I've found a man just like Father!" Her mother replies, "So what do you want from me, sympathy?"
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Posted by Riya in Family 11M ago
Ben: "Dad, there is a hole in my shoe." Dad: "Yes, Ben, that's where you put your foot."
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Posted by Riya in Family 11M ago
Q: What's the difference between a genealogist and a gynecologist? A: The genealogist checks the family tree and the gynecologist checks the family bush.
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Posted by Riya in Family 11M ago
On his first visit to the zoo, a little boy stared at the caged stork for a long time and asked his dad, "Why doesn't the stork recognize me?"
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Posted by Riya in Family 11M ago
What is the difference between an outlaw and an in-law? Outlaws are wanted.
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